"Words"

We are building off of what we discussed last week, the importance of taming your tongue. The questions we talk about are based off of the ones from Student Ministry.

1. What's the most common remark you make to others that may not be very Christ-like? Cursing, put-downs, pressure/threats, black mail, sarcasm, sexual jokes
2. How does that make you feel when you say them? We got quite a mix of answers: bad, better, guilty, good, regret, happy.
3. How does it make you feel when those remarks are said to you? Sad, upset, horrible, mad. It's obvious that we don't like being told non-Christ-like words, yet we still tend to say them to other people.
4. Are you more likely to say mean things to others when you are with others and why? Yes, because you are putting on a facade for other people, trying to look "cool".
5. When you put others down, are you the bigger person? Our teens answered that it "depends". They feel like the bigger person when they are venting their feelings to others.
6. When person A calmly puts down person B, but person B retaliates, who really wins that situation? No one-they are both on the same level.

There are many ways to vent to other people that does not involve remarks that are not Christ-like. You will never be the bigger person if you "vent" using hurtful and ugly words. No one likes hearing those words said to them, so we shouldn't be quick to say them to other people. "Say only what helps, each word a gift" (Ephesians 4:29, MSG).

Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.
~Ephesians 4:29 (NLT)

Words
Hawk Nelson

They've made me feel like a prisoner
They've made me feel set free
They've made me feel like a criminal
Made me feel like a king

They've lifted my heart
To places I'd never been
And they've dragged me down
Back to where I began

Words can build you up
Words can break you down
Start a fire in your heart or
Put it out

Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You

You can heal the heartache
Speak over the fear
(Speak over the fear)
God, Your voice is the only thing
We need to hear
(We need to hear)

Words can build us up
Words can break us down
Start a fire in our hearts or
Put it out

Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You
(Back to You)

Let the words I say
(Let the words I say)
Be the sound of Your grace
(Sound like Your grace)
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You

I wanna speak Your love
Not just another noise
Oh, I wanna be Your light
I wanna be Your voice

Let my words be life
Let my words be truth
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You
(Back to You)

Let the words I say
(Let the words I say)
Be the sound of Your grace
(Sound like Your grace)
I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You
(Back to You)

Words can build us up
Words can break us down
Start a fire in our hearts
Or put it out

I don't wanna say a word
Unless it points the world back to You

Taming the Tongue

We found a great message from Student Ministry about Taming the Tongue.

Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. ² We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. ³ When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. ⁴ Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. ⁵ Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. ⁶ The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.
⁷ All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, ⁸ but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
⁹ With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. ¹⁰ Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. ¹¹ Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? ¹² My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.
~James 3 (NIV)

The 3 illustrations in that passage are:

• Horses: a very powerful animal controlled by a small piece of metal in their mouth
• Ships: Huge, important vehicles, but useless without a rudder, which directs the ship.
• Fire: Not much of anything, but has the capability of creating a large and dangerous fire.

What you choose to put into your body effects what your body looks like. Your words show and affect how you live your life. If you curse, boast, slander others, and use other negative words, it shows that you are trying to hurt others. The issue is the fact that you don't choose your words wisely. When you don't choose your words wisely, you fall out of favor with God.

Choose your words wisely, whether in person or online. The negative things we say about other people can have a great impact on them. Even side comments and jokes that are said may not mean any harm, but many times, it makes a deep impact on them. There's a saying: sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can hurt forever. Your jokes and insignificant words can be so hurtful to others!

{Source}

A couple other versions of the James passage:

^5-6 It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell.
~James 3 (MSG)

 ² Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way. ³ We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth. ⁴ And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. ⁵ In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches.
But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. ⁶ And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.
~James 3 (NLT)

Sticks & Stones Poem:
Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones...
But Words Can Hurt Forever

Bruises heal and bones can mend,
But feelings will not ever,

Sticks fail and stones may miss
But well aimed words will never